I-M-Patience.

It has been a very long time since I last wrote. I was caught up in work. I still am neck-deep in work, but I really need something to take my mind off of things. This semester is my fifth, out of ten long semesters. And it has been quite a challenge so far. Emotionally. No, none of the boohoo crap. It’s my tolerance. It has diminished to an extent that makes me doubts its existence. I shall talk about that in another post, maybe. Point is, I needed to blog again or else my head would just explode. And so, I shall talk about, ironically, PATIENCE.

This is quite a challenging topic for me, considering I have a very low patience level of my own. But sometimes, even I feel like some people really need to have patience, in certain relationships. Especially the romantic kind.

Why are we in such a hurry to get things done? Maybe in an era of fast food, fast communication and fast forwarded lives in general, we expect our problems and their solutions to fast forward too. I have news my friend. Not gonna happen.

In a very short span of time, several friends of mine had a glitch in their relationships. And they just gave up. Too soon, I felt. It got me wondering. One cannot just enter into a relationship and assume it to work on its own. You need to work it out. And the solving will take time too. You can’t just snap your fingers and expect everything to get back to normal.

True, some of the fights are small. You can sleep it over and it gets solved the next day. But not all spats are of the same magnitude. Some need sorting out. Voluntary sorting out. Laying down bare facts on the table. A voluntary dispute resolution, if I may say so. Coming to an agreement. Setting a limit, extending others.

Patience is the key. And there are no duplicates. And you can’t pick this lock. So no instant solutions either.

Another feature I saw common in these occurrences, for want of a better term, is best described by a concept in law called “volenti non fit injuria”. In colloquial words, it is best explained as, “you had it coming”. If this element is proved by the party you are suing, you can kiss your case goodbye.

So is the case with relationships. You break a person’s trust, you can’t expect them to forgive you with open arms. If they do, congratulations, you’ve found yourself a keeper. If not, congratulations, you are dating a normal human being. No one is Mother Teresa. If you have ego, it is reasonable that the other person will have it too. Someone HAS to let go of their ego. Why not be the one? Do you not cherish your relationship? What is more important here?

However, one very important warning I HAVE to give is, do not take it too far. Yes, let go of your ego. But not so much that the other side starts taking you for granted. Let them know they cannot walk all over you, and expect you to stay still. DO NOT stay still. Don't become a doormat.

And with this, let me get back to raising my blood pressure over all the irritating people around me.